My older brother and I recently had a serious talk. Well, serious for us. It was a discussion about my love life or lack there of. He theorized by sharing with me one of his astonishing lessons of life as only my dear "never-been-without-a-woman-in-a-split-second-of-his-life" brother could. He said, "Guys look at girls in two ways; there are the girls you marry and the girls you want to F*** for one night!" Well obviously I consider myself the marrying kind given those limited choices. Anyway, even though I am the "nice girl" that I am, it does not mean that girls like me are not thinking about ultimate nights of pure passion. For instance, in my mind, there are three kinds of men. The men you marry (the ones who are financially prosperous, stable-minded yet ambitious by nature and can afford a woman of good taste), the ones you avoid (players, jerks and A-Holes), and the ones you dream of messing around with ( i.e. the waiter at Margarita's Restaurant). No, I'm not messing around with the very hot Italian waiter from Margarita's, but sometimes when I stop in there for take out, we glance at each other and then glance at each other again. All Italian in his tight black short sleeve shirt, thin gold chain, and bulging biceps, I will hear him say in Rocky Balboa-ish finesse, "Welcome to Margarita's, can I help you?" Now, maybe this guy is working his way through night school at Steven's Institute or maybe his family owns Margarita's and it will be his place someday…I have no idea. All I know is the last time I was in there I was with my parents, and my mom (who has quite the dirty mind and an eye for the studs as well) struggled to stop smiling when he asked us, "Can I bring anyone dessert?" My mom immediately looked at me and blushingly grinned, "Tara, would you like the dessert?" Ignoring my mom's question, I looked directly up at him, smiled and said, "Not today"…and with a wink I added, "Next time". He smiled back and walked back to the kitchen, hopefully with the same thoughts on his mind that I had.
Sometimes I cannot help but think to myself, would simply loving a man with passion and attraction only be enough to last? Or are my needs for stability and profitability so contentment-driven that I would settle with a man for (as some would say) the wrong reasons. Currently, I am watching myself evolve. I am wondering who could possibly stimulate and excite me so much that in the end I finally settle for someone totally different and unexpected from what my friends and family would predict.
Could my love life be as noteworthy and anticipated as Harry Potter's fate? It is certainly as much a fantasy.