Thursday, September 29, 2005

This or That

We make decisions every day. Some as simple as “should I wear my hair up or down?” or the more complicated decision, “Should I walk to Starbucks on Indiana or drive to Starbucks on East Third?” “Should I study now or after I go to the gym?” Everyday “this or that” decisions make up most of our four years of college life. Life is good, fairly uncomplicated. Yet in those four years there is still that big looming decision that lies peaceful and still until Year Four. Then it raises its ugly head...What am I going to do after graduation? Where do I want to go? The good news is I don’t have to think about anyone else in my life so that does make the decision far less difficult. I’m leaving Indiana with a feeling of “job well done Tara, now get me the heck out of here”. The only company in Indiana that I would even consider working for is Eli Lilly. Lilly offers relocation to dozens of other cities all over the world. That’s amazing! Lilly would be an awesome company to work for as a sales rep. I think I’d be highly successful selling large stocks of Cialis to a group of middle-aged physicians! I could work that!

Other options would be working with retail or apparel companies. Here is where my creative side would play a part. Gap, Macy’s, and Saks come to IU to interview its graduating seniors. I like many of these companies headquarter locations so I’m pretty excited about pursuing them all. New York is still my first choice location. It’s where I’ve always wanted to work…where I’ve always imagined myself, at least where I would start. Am I afraid? No, never, not in New York. New York exudes a sense of excitement unlike anywhere else I’ve ever been. It’s a melting pot of all of the world’s people. There are friends from back home and even IU who are currently living there now. I can’t wait to see them again.

Anyway, as I begin attending career fairs, going on interviews, and making next-step decisions about my life, whether it be pitching the use of Cialis for your erectile dysfunction, Strattera for your hyper-active ADHD kids who are out of control, and Prozac– to make everyone a little happier in life, OR whether I’m promoting clothing lines, working in the product development field of beauty products, or a Buyer for a top line designer, I think the little decisions I’ve made on my own each day, plus the IU experience as a whole, has given me the confidence to realize who I am, what I am capable of, and that the world is truly at my fingertips. As Franky so smoothly sings, “I’ve got the world on a string”.

Friday, September 23, 2005

A Confession

I returned to my apartment around 8 p.m. one night after grabbing dinner out with a friend. As I opened the door to my apartment I quickly realized I had forgotten to turn my light on prior to leaving, an odd mishap for me. I shrugged it off and immediately did my usual rituals which was removing my shoes and making a quick phone call home to say hi. As the phone rang, I saw him from out of the corner of my eye, he was huge and frightening. As I dropped the phone, I could hear my mother say hello, but out of fear I ignored her voice and started to hyperventilate in panic of what I should do. I screamed…loud with terror. Trying to think fast on my feet, I knew it was going to be either him or me. He turned toward me and then stopped unsure of his own decision to either attack or run out. All I could think about was how did he get in here. I’ve never seen him around here before or anywhere else for that matter. I remember uttering 50 times over and over, “oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” By this time my mother’s tiny voice was calling me through my cell phone yelling my name in sheer panic knowing she couldn’t help me from a million miles away, while her daughter was about to be raped and killed. The only thing I could grab as a weapon was my shoe, which I had just removed two minutes before. Now remember, I was crying and screaming but something inside me gave me power…power to fight back. For a minute an incredible amount of self-preservation came upon me. I knew the years of kickboxing and Taebo were about to pay off. I took my shoe and hit him…and hit him again, and again, and then finally, one last crushing blow to his skull and it was finished. He was dead. I killed him. I was exhausted and could hardly move. I threw myself onto my futon expressionless and limp. Breaking the silence I suddenly heard my mother crying through the phone still calling me saying “Tara, where are you?” I picked up the phone and began to cry and told my mother I had just killed the biggest bug I had ever seen in my entire life.